An Antipathetic Isu

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According to Ontario's Ministry of Education, it requires that each student within OAC Writer's Craft must produce an Independent Study Unit (ISU) to pass the course. It states that, The independent-study unit in OAC should culminate in a paper involving original work, such as a short story or a script, or the analysis of the style and structure of a work of literature. The ministry also states that it must account for twenty percent of the final grade. There are few expectations, and few restrictions; only the subject of your choice to study. After all, it's independent. In fact, the term independent means needing, wishing, or getting no help from others according to the Sixth Addition of Thorndike and Barnhart's Dictionary. Therefore, I recommend you take this advice in literature seriously.

You will always experience predictable frustrating times when you're deciding what to write about for the assignment itself. Everyone knows that if you decided to write an essay, the proper way is to make sure that the ending matches the beginning in some way or another. Who really makes the rules on essay writing? In math you wouldn't be penalized if you put the answer in the blank and then showed your rough work. You have four apples and it doesn't matter how they dropped off the tree, but this isn't mathematics; this is English. You should produce an essay that values aspects of an opening idea, the story/idea itself and of course, the moral or wrapping-up spiel. It's all taught to every student throughout English courses, including all the little future Booker McConnell Prize winners, I should hope.

Now here's the next dilemma. It would be a dramatic understatement for me to say I am not exactly a fan of coming up with ISU topics. Being optimistic, I agree that writing papers can be fun; it's just the paperwork that I don't like. According to my standards, whatever paper I hand in had better be idealistically perfect. Whoever said a person's perfectionism was a pet peeve? It just takes time. Therefore, it being my last year of high school, this paper's honest notion presented as my chosen ISU topic is well overdue.

I usually end up sitting at the computer mindlessly pounding keys to come up with a paragraph on a certain idea. At that point in time, whether it is in grade seven or in my final year of high school, I am usually proud of what I've accomplished. This is, until I realize I have nothing more to add to the subject and all I have to show is enough blank paper to write my will. That beginning paragraph will nonetheless, not help anyone to accumulate the final product in the range of four to six pages. Did I not mention that there are usually no expectations, but wait! There are expectations. Everyone knows that handing in a one page ISU on your thoughts of the rich and famous will not cut it. Some cases, such as Princess Diana are too controversial and that means opinionating thought and recollections. My opinion, for instance, is what did she ever do to deserve all that media attention? Charity work. With Christmas behind us it reminds me of the cheerful Salvation Army Santas in every town in this area. They work just as hard, if not harder in a volunteer opportunity that we properly named Charity. The truth is, Princess Diana married Charles. That Santa wasn't so lucky. In the future you'll be sitting there reading my opinion paper, but I already know that the ending of that will not match the beginning because I've studied the subject so independently that I don't know what my opinion is anymore. I am therefore, back to where I started. I still need a topic to write about that will strike my fancy enough to strike yours.

What could I write about? Writer's block isn't just a condition or… or, so anyway, moving on. Of course, I could have written my autobiography, but let's face it, if I were to tell my life story that would be the easy way out. Secrets would be unleashed, my reputation would be at stake and therefore, if I told you I would have to kill you. The next idea that I came up with was to create a magazine. To produce a hit magazine, it must sell. People magazine, for instance, cobbles people together out of press photos, bylines, and headlines. All I would have to do with my magazine is to revise the story of Brittany Spears. By the end of the article, you'd believe that she's comparable to America's sex symbol Jean Harlow. It doesn't matter if it's truth or not, the important part is that you believed it. My magazine would now be bigger than Playboy itself. Another hot topic I could have written about was the Toronto Maple Leafs. In order to do that though, I should have done some in-class research before hand to make sure the editor of my essay also thought that the team resembles a vacuum cleaner. They affect everyone and everything around them, but they also suck.

The following statements are what go through my head in my attempts to come up with an essay idea. If you don't make a good starting sentence, you might as well kiss the essay goodbye and go back to honing in on your brown nosing skills. The reader needs to know if the trip is necessary. Honestly, it's obvious there is no point in finding the end of a rainbow if somewhere can't be found. What fires me up? What blows my hair back? There is politics, women's rights, entertainment, music, books, cars, sweaters, cement, wood and even toothbrushes. Am I looking to do an opinion piece or do I just want to put forth an analysis of something beautiful, such as art, literature, filming, or Michael Jackson? The quote, All the writers are complaining that there is too much freedom. They need some pressure. The worse your daily life, the better your are. If you have to be careful because of oppression and censorship, this pressure produces diamonds is definitely a no brainer in writer Tatyana Tolstaya's world! It's a beautiful quote, but I bet it took a while to come up with that one.

We've established that ISU stands for Independent Study Unit. Writing this essay, I've come to realize that Independent Study Unit is far from the student's real meaning. For some it stands for Independence Stolen Undoubtedly (on the night before the essay is due). That original time frame for the ISU has gone from two months to one school night. As for me, I can tell you honestly that I've been thinking and working on my ISU topic for approximately six years, four months, three weeks, a couple days, and many, many hours. Every time I've gone to write an ISU in the past, I've worked on this current ISU. I knew that someday all my malicious thoughts would pay off. Therefore, for this ISU I am Ideally Standing Unconcerned, for once. For the people who work really hard on their ISU in the first couple of weeks the assignment was assigned and then leave the rest for the night before, ISU stands for Inappropriate Spanning that is Uncalled-for. If you're going to write the essay, then write it! Those people who just don't put in enough effort to their ISU's will Inevitably Symbolize Uncertainty of a passing mark. The truth is that reading an essay would be much easier then producing one. One of the fringe benefits of being the editor is reading the occasional jewel of a writer's blooper. Their should be a penalty against more then too mistakes in copywrited book.

Although this is my last year of high school, I definitely know it will not be my last chance to write down my witticism, intelligence or furthermore, my beloved spite. You've just read the workings of my mind whenever I've hear the words Your Independent Study Unit is due... This ISU will reflect my identity, strengths and weaknesses as a writer in training. Steve Martin once said, I think I did pretty well, considering I started out with a bunch of blank paper. To sum everything up about ISU assignments, they are only a few words I can honestly tell you. Those words being Why don't you hit me with your best shot and fire away!

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